Mary Ann Weiss calls it “toddler mayhem.”
Parents call it “the kind of event we want to come to.”
And PJ Library Manager Bethany Friedlander says it is a “testimony to the power of a single person.”
This “Pre-Hanukkah Shabbat Dinner” is all that and more. With cookies, crafts, and chilled beverages for the parents, PJ Library Family Connectors have gathered more than 100 moms, dads, grandparents, and children of all ages at Table Public House for what feels like a very large and joyfully noisy family reunion.
In one corner, a little girl is carefully creating a Hanukkiah, one drop of glue at a time. In another corner, more children are decorating Hanukkah cookies. There are limitless latkes and grilled cheese sandwiches. Everywhere, there are children, from infants to toddlers to big kids, many dressed in Hanukkah-themed pajamas
Mary Ann Weiss, Nikki Kitain, and Arielle Gumer
The families have been brought together by JEWISHcolorado PJ Library Family Connector Mary Ann Weiss, with her fellow organizers Nikki Kitain and Arielle Gumer, for a social event centered on the neighborhoods of Washington Park and Platt Park.
In the two years since Weiss signed up to be a Family Connector for Jewish families in her neighborhood, she has watched interest in the program grow significantly. At her first Hanukkah party, 12 families came, and she was thrilled.
“They were people I had never met before and some lived right up the block!” Weiss says. “I made lifelong friends I never would have met otherwise.”
PJ Library Manager Bethany Friedlander (left)
Three years later, 30 families signed up to come to this year’s party, the majority—though not all—from zip codes 80210 and 80209. Sara Dishell joined the group when she lived in Platt Park and now has moved to Hilltop, but she came to the party to see old friends.
“I remember going to my first gathering of this group and thinking, ‘I had no idea there were this many Jewish people in Platt Park,’” she says. “These events gather Jewish families who are proud of their Jewish identity and want to raise their kids to also be proud of their Jewish identity.”
‘It takes a village’
When Mary Ann Weiss moved to Denver in late 2021, she had a two-year-old and a baby on the way. At a PJ Library story time event at Ekar Farm, Weiss asked Bethany Friedlander if PJ Library ever did events in Platt Park or Washington Park. Friedlander told her about the Family Connector model, where parents self-organize. By the summer of 2022, Weiss had held her first event—a Tot Shabbat singalong in Platt Park.
From there, she moved to more events—Purim parties, Hanukkah parties, and mom and dad nights out. She discovered that her community preferred doing fewer big events to many small events. They also liked keeping the events local.
“I love that the Family Connector model grounds the community in a physical space,” Weiss says. “You don’t have to drive to the other side of town. It’s grassroots with young families who are interested in gathering with other young families in alternative spaces where parents can enjoy themselves as much as their children.”
Weiss believes that parents of young families can feel isolated because of the demands of parenting, and she is mindful to make sure children-centered events like the Pre-Hanukkah party also feel like a party for the parents.
“You are so busy with your own children, but at the same time it takes a village,” she says. “To have a joyful, inclusive Jewish community of other families who also have children in the same age range really meets that need. A lot of families have moved to Denver and don’t have grandparents nearby so it’s even more important to find people to do things with and to celebrate holidays.”
At the party, Weiss recites Hamotzi, and everyone shares a very large challah. This may not be a strictly traditional Shabbat, and that is fine with everyone there.
“Jewish life has adapted to meet families where they are,” says Weiss. “That is the superpower of Judaism. It can evolve. People gather differently than they did a generation ago, but the tradition and teachings are timeless. We still want to instill the values of love and joy of Judaism for the next generation.”
At the Table Public House Pre-Hanukkah party, Geoff Davis was enjoying his first PJ Library event along with his wife and his 9-year-old, 8-year-old and 1-year-old children. He acknowledged that with three children in the PJ Library program, they have lots of PJ Library books on their shelves, but the event takes their involvement to a new level.
“It’s nice to know that everyone here is Jewish,” he says. “It’s a wonderful event. Even if you didn’t have kids, this would be inspiring.”
‘We owe a tremendous debt’
The PJ Library Family Connector program launched in its current form two-and-a-half years ago after JEWISHcolorado learned about the needs and interests of Colorado families through a previous initial grant from National PJ Library.
“The idea was that a parent with children who are PJ Library age and lives in a community that may be underserved by already established Jewish institutions steps up and becomes the connecting force for parents in that area,” says Friedlander. “We learned a lot from the launch—especially that we needed connectors beyond the Denver metro area.”
Today, JEWISHcolorado’s PJ Library program has 14 Family Connectors in communities as far-flung as Steamboat Springs and Castle Rock, Aspen and Westminster. Each Family Connector cultivates a unique culture, reflecting the community where they live.
In Littleton, the Connector started the group when she had a six-month-old baby, so the community gathered around her with their 6-month-olds. They have now grown, and the children are now two years old. In Southeast Aurora, the Connector has assembled a multi-generational group, from infants to grandparents.
“In Wash Park and Platt Park, the children probably don’t go to Jewish preschools because they don’t have a Jewish building that is closer than 20 minutes’ drive,” says Friedlander. “Mary Ann figured out that they like to have fun in certain ways, and they prefer that it be within walking distance or nearby. She started this and has grown it with her vision.”
Friedlander has found her Family Connectors through word of mouth. They tend to be people who want to serve their community and improve the Jewish lives of others.
“We owe a tremendous debt to these Family Connectors,” she says. “They are the eyes and ears and hearts of the Jewish community.”